Monster
by TheCrimsonAvatar
Summary: Zuko and Katara fall in love, how will Aang react? Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender
1. Chapter 1

Aang felt like his heart had just been brutally ripped out from his chest. He couldn't help but stare as he saw Katara kissing Zuko, their hands running in each others hair, on each others bodies. This sinking feeling make him feel like he was falling, plummeting down a dark hole of despair.

Sweat started to form on his face as he finally turned away and salty tears burned his face. Aang fell to the ground and gripped the soil with his fingers. He felt numb, like he was non existent. He threw his arms towards the sky and screamed, roaring at the injustice of the world.

Aang dimly heard Katara gasp and come running towards him with Zuko looking concerned. They stopped a few feet away from his quivering body, shaking with grief and anger. He glared into Katara's surprised eyes and she saw Aang hurt beyond any injury she had seen him sustain.

"Why…?" Aang whimpered his voice barely over a whisper. "Was it something I said? Something I did? Why? Why him?"

Katara just looked at Aang guiltily. "Zuko and I have been together ever since you mastered firebending. I didn't think…Aang, I would never hurt you… I would never…" Her voice was high and scratchy, her throat bone dry.

"Then why does it hurt so much?!?" Aang screamed his voice cracking. "Why can't I have one thing? The only thing that I have ever wanted was you Katara! I am saving the world for you, I am mastering the elements for you, I am still alive for you, EVERYTHING I HAVE DONE WAS FOR YOU!!"

Katara just stood petrified, next to Zuko who looked clearly frightened. Aang fell to his knees and gripped the earth again, this time earthbending cracks into the ground causing miniature earthquakes. He felt like he was truly defeated, Katara's love scorching his insides more ferociously than Ozai ever could.

"Aang… I am sorry…" Katara barely said, her eyes tearing up seeing her friend in so much pain.

"No…" Aang said to himself. He put on a look of fake determination and opened his glider. "I can't do this… I can't do this…" He leaped into the sky, taking off as Katara and Zuko called after him, but Aang ignored their cries.

Aang just felt the air roaring in his ears, focused on the air buffering him in the sky. Aang was destroyed. He needed to vent, he needed something, anything… Then he saw the mountain. Aang flew upwards until he was atop the towering mound of earth and he dropped his glider, letting it float to the ground, thousands of feet down. He began to freefall towards the mountains peak and he shrieked as he brought his fists down on the snow-capped mountain. The mountain began to fissure and crumble. Aang smashed his fists into the mountaintop again, letting his anger and sorrow turn into his constant unrelenting assault on the mountain.

After a dozen beatings the mountain began to rumble, and angry lava spurted from the earth's wounds. He bent the magma to start shooting up into the sky, spraying wildly in all directions. Aang saw Katara embracing Zuko in his mind, both of them groping and moaning…

He then unintentionally entered the avatar state. He was beyond any consul or calming. His eyes and tattoos glowed white as he drained the lava out of the mountain and sent it soaring into the air, landing all around the now broken mountain. He kept himself afloat on a vortex of air as the peak fell away. He let loose all of his powers in anger, eventually leveling the mountain. As he slowly started to allow himself to come to the cracked and blistered ground, he slipped out of the avatar state, but stayed conscious. He still had tears streaming down his face, still grief stricken.

As he was set on the ground, he saw the surrounding forest was entirely burnt and bleeding. Trees everywhere were slowly sinking in still bubbling lava, catching on fire. His glider was undoubtedly burned beyond recognition somewhere, but he did not care. He hurt so much, and could not heal himself. He gazed back where the camp was, where Katara and Zuko were…

He sobbed, crying uncontrollably, his hands gripping the sides of his head. This can't be happening, this is all a dream, life can't be this unfair, he thought. Aang smacked himself a few times desperately trying to convince himself that it a horrible nightmare.

But there he stood, burning chaos all around him matching the twisting turmoil in side him, as he laid down, still weeping into the ground. She was all he had, she was his life, how could she…

Aang didn't know how long he lay there, unmoving and crying. He didn't have the strength to move, and he didn't want to. His life was shattered, his inner fire cruelly snuffed out. He just lay there, atop charred and ashy earth, letting his tears run on the ground.

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Aang barely felt as Sokka ran to him, gripping his shoulders with Toph. Momo chattered unceasingly, roaming all over his curled body. Katara and Zuko just stood away, both looking bashful and concerned. Katara's eyes were puffy and red, and Zuko's face was so pale it looked ghostly.

"Aang! Aang speak to me, are you hurt?" Sokka said, gripping his shoulders. Aang wasn't just hurt; he was ravaged and brutally beaten. But he couldn't bring himself to say that.

"Leave me." Is all Aang said, his eyes pressed closed.

"Aang snap out of it, we need to move! Fire Nation forces found us, we need to leave!" Sokka nearly screamed. Aang didn't care, at least if he was killed, the pain would stop. Even feeling Katara's eyes on him was unbearable.

"Aang please…" Katara said. Aang recoiled as if he was stabbed with an icy knife. She spoke to him…

Suddenly he felt a heat wave flow over him, and he rose to a sitting position and opened his eyes. A group of firebenders approached, spitting flames from their hands towards Katara and the others. He then rose. These men were not going to survive this fight.

Aang earthbended a spear and hurled it at the nearest firebender. He was blown off his feet, impaled by the spike of earth. Aang heard the entire gang gasp at his brutality, but he didn't care. The next firebender came up and shot flames at Aang. He quenched the pathetic flame easily and shot one at his attacked that was ten times bigger. The man didn't even get to scream as he was obliterated, a charred scorch mark the only evidence he had ever existed.

The other five Fire Nation soldiers tried to flee, but Aang enclosed them within 3 walls and allowed the walls to fall upon the soldiers with a sickening crunch. He then looked back at his friends.

They all stared at him in horror, a pure terrifying horror. His normally bright and cheerful eyes were hard and uncaring. He had just murdered seven men in cold blood, and didn't even blink as he did so. Katara looked at him murmured something as he looked at her. The knife in him twisted and he blinked

Then he walked away. No one could believe that Aang was that evil, but he knew that this shell of his former self would never be able to restore itself. He had become a monster.

Katara started to sob as he walked away. "I am sorry Aang!" she yelled after him, but he didn't hear her. He just continued to walk, eyes cold and tearing up.

" I am too."


	2. Chapter 2

Aang didn't know how long he had sat on the mountaintop meditating. No one ever disturbed him, no one could climb up the jagged and treacherous slopes that he had crafted himself. He just sat, legs crossed and thought of… nothing.

A few months after he ran away from the group, he had learnt that anything that he thought about no matter how minor or trivial reminded him of Katara. And each time he saw her face or heard her voice he just fell apart. The angry wound in his chest would rip open again and the pain he felt that fateful day when he saw Katara kiss Zuko would return, just as strong as if he had just witnessed the act.

So he sat, eyes closed, thinking of nothing. Being up so high and lacking oxygen, it was not hard to empty his mind of thoughts.

A fly came and landed on his arm and caused a prickling sensation on his arm. _Just like she did when she looked at him, sending shivers down his spine with every giggle and flawless gesture…_

"No!" The Avatar yelled, his voice echoing all around him. He would not bring her back into him; he wouldn't allow himself to bring on so much pain.

He calmed down and continued to sit, feeling the breeze on his cheeks, so icy and light. _Just like at night when he would gaze lovingly at her form next to Sokka in a sleeping bag, her innocent features portraying a slight smile…_

The Avatar became enraged and stood up suddenly, slicing his arm downward and earthbending a crackdown the face of the mountain, causing a avalanche of rock and rubble to fall to the layer of clouds beneath him. He stood gasping, his fist still clenched with a wild expression on his aged features.

He quickly sat down and attempted to wipe his mind of everything, of his memories, of his tragedy.

Minutes, hours, days later he could hear a rushing wind that was unnatural in his setting, stood out of place. _No one could have made it up the mountain, the only way I did was because I can airbend, and the only other living being that can do that is…_

He heard Appa snort and crash in his ledge he carved for him to sleep on. The only time Aang ate was when Appa would go get food for himself and bring some to Aang, so he mindlessly let him continue his forays for food. But this time Aang could tell that his bison had more than food with him.

He dreaded what he might see when he opened his eyelids but nevertheless, he did. What he saw made his heart stop.

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"Aang?" Katara's voice cracked as she openly stared at him. He had changed so much over the four years that had passed since she had seen him. His body which had been sinewy and muscular had deflated and shrunk. His already fragile frame looked like it would break apart in the wind. But by far the worst was his cold grey eyes that had turned dull, vacant and glazed.

She was speechless. How could she have done this to him? Her best friend? He was wasted away and looked like a living corpse.

"Katara. It has been a long time." He said, his voice cracking slightly from underuse. He shifted from his stance, allowing his skinny legs to curl against his body.

She lunged for him, determined to comfort him in this state. With a flick of his arms he rose quickly into the air, twisting to avoid her touch. She just stood, looking up at him as he slowly floated back to the peak.

"You can't. Please, don't." He said, his voice hollow. Those words tore through her, and she felt like she was dirty, guilty of turning him into this.

"Aang, am I worth this? Am I worth destroying yourself over?" She felt tears burning her eyes and running down her face.

Aang just looked at her sadly. "I ask that to myself everyday. Logically, no you are not. We were friends and nothing more, despite how much I wanted us to be lovers."

"I don't know what to say. I love you Aang, but only as a brother. I married Zuko, and we are happy. Why can't that be enough?"

"Because I am selfish!" He yelled at her, throwing his frail arms up in frustration. "I want you! I have always wanted you! I have never felt like this, felt so powerless, such a slave to my emotions! But now I know why the monks are celibate! Love is a horrible feeling that leads people to becoming broken and tortured!"

Aang stopped his tirade and calmly sat down, closing his eyes, trying to erase this rare case of human contact from his mind.

"Leave me, and never come back."

Katara just stared at him and in a moment of weakness and instinct lunged forward again to hug him. This caught him unaware and soon he was in Katara's fierce grip. He struggled weakly but deep down beneath his hurt, he wanted to feel her warmth.

Katara felt his body shaking in her grip, but that just made her want to comfort him more so the hug tightened. Aang cried for the first time in years, allowing all his hurt his pain opening up again like a floodgate. She felt her clothes dampening from his tears.

"I am sorry Aang. For everything, for not being there, for letting you fall in love with me, for not seeing this happen…" She whispered between sobs. "I am so sorry…"

"Please Katara, you did nothing wrong, it was my fault. I wasn't good enough for your love; I was never what you wanted. I can't control my own feelings, I am too weak." He spoke in a voice laden with sadness and regret.

Both just sat there, gripping each others bodies and crying, as the wind whipped up around them. After what seemed like ages they pulled apart, Aang looking slightly better. His eyes had some of their old sparkle back, even though tears still streamed down his face.

"Katara, I don't know why you care for me so much, but I know that I can't allow myself to corrupt you too. You are pure, loving, and just… perfect. I am a monster; I have done unspeakable things…"

"Aang…" She tried to convince him that he was just hurt, but was cut off.

"I have killed countless numbers of people. Some deserved it but some were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I have the blood of thousands on my hands."

She was stupefied. She knew that Aang had gained a reputation for being excessively violent, but she just dismissed these rumors as false. Her Aang would never do something like that.

"It was because every time I would get angry or sad, the Avatar State would take me over, and I wouldn't care who I hurt or who was killed. I wanted all of them to hurt like me; I wanted them to suffer like I had…"

"But no more. Thank you Katara, for opening my eyes to my own demons, making me realize what I have to do to balance the world once again, to make the world a better place for everyone."

Katara smiled. He is going to become his old self again, laughing and playing, carefree. Aang will become the avatar that he always wanted to be and finally he would be at peace with himself.

Aang continued to smile sadly and stared into her eyes for a while before earthbending a giant hole into the peak, careful to keep the stability of the ledge so it wouldn't give away.

"Take care of Appa for me. I have always loved you and I hope in time you can forget about me and be happy. Goodbye my love."

Before Katara could even utter a sound, Aang leaned back and allowed his body to freefall down the dark hole, earthbending a cover on the opening and sealing himself in.

She didn't know how long she was on the ground on all fours pounding on the ground, screaming his name. Her fists were bleeding, her clothing soiled and torn, and her eyes wide and wet.

Katara screamed until her voice was hoarse and she lost her voice. She ultimately laid down, her back pressed to the cold earth atop the peak, her body shaking in sorrow. She found her thoughts wandering to when she broke him out of the iceberg, when they were lost in the Cave of Two Lovers, when she danced with him in the Fire Nation, when he died in her arms in Ba Sing Se, when she took him into her arms after he killed Ozai…

She just lay weeping, thinking of the innocent boy who was denied the only person that kept his sanity, and self destructed to the point of suicide. If only she loved him, if only he didn't love her, if only…

A/N- The idea popped into my head, I was in a pretty dark mood. This is the last installment, I don't write stories well when Aang isn't in them, so don't expect another surprise sequel. The Rage of the Avatar has me stumped and I kinda abandoned the plot line, and think it was better as a one (three?) shot. So, if the muse sings in my ear, I will write a new story. Thanks for reading, and all reviews are greatly appreciated!


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